Starting Week Three - Peace of Mind is a hard won gift

I’m not posting updates in real time at this point for privacy reasons. Yes, it sucks but I have a responsibility to myself (especially while in treatment) to take care of myself, keep a healthy mind and keep my eye on the prize.

Being able to spend time with my significant other this weekend was sooooooo therapeutic. I really wish I could have him with me full time during the treatment. He observed my treatment on Friday. He is super supportive. I wasn’t expecting to have to go through this treatment alone but due to some crazy circumstances, here I am. I am fortunate my husband is a rock star and is willing to give up his time to come here and support me. He will be coming here again once more when it’s time for me to move out. My leg problems are making mobility very difficult and he is going to help me pack and load up. I will be grateful for the help.

Treatment today was much easier than the start of last week. It’s not nearly as painful for me. A person getting their first treatment today said it was very uncomfortable but not horrible. I am glad that this patient is not experiencing what I did. I am hoping that treatment is a piece of cake from here forward. I have two weeks left.

I haven’t noticed too much in terms of a change in my depression symptoms except I am not ruminating as much about things that bother me and the nightmares about traumatic events in my life that I have been getting nightly for the last 10+ years have stopped. For most, this might not seem like much of an improvement but for me these two changes are huge huge gifts. The fact that it is helping most noticeably so far with my PTSD symptoms is encouraging! I’m still having anxiety and depression but man, to not have the constant re-traumatization nightly by those nightmares is a wonderful peace I have longed for. I hope it continues.